sean and narcissus


I HELD ELIZABETH TAYLOR’S HAIR BACK – SWEAR.

 Today my friend Sophia and I went for a late lunch at The West Hollywood Gay and Lesbian Community Center, aka The Abbey. Halfway through our entry-lap Sophia grabs my arm and whispers in my ear, “Sean, Elizabeth… Elizabeth Taylor.” Major heart-stoppage. (Me, not Elizabeth Taylor).

So, after a few more totally inconspicuous pass-bys we settled down at a prime Liz-viewing table for lunch. We pretty much ate in silence, breaking it every so often with an “oh my God” and “yeah, i know” and indulging in guilt-full peeks whenever we we wern’t texting everyone we know and could come up with the slightest pretense of looking her way.

Yeah, we’re pretty cool.

She looked amazing, and, despite being confined to her chair, seemed to be having a very good time. Actually, considering that she was out cocktailing with her gays mid-afternoon, confined might not be the best word to describe this lady.

As Elizabeth and her entourage began to leave, madness broke out as the news of Her Presence rippled through the lunching gays who had failed to take a celebrity-spotting lap as Sophia and I had. For most, courtesy and self-respect were quickly gotten over by the prospect of having a blury shot of one of their major living idols on their cell-phone.

About a dozen paparazzi swarmed Elizabeth and her entourage as the wrought iron gates of the club (which had been shuttered to keep them out) swung open. The five or so feet between the entrance of the club and the backseat of the waiting Maybach coach took about 5 minutes to cover. Evading paparazzi = not so easy for the wheelchair-bound. Watch out, Itzhak Perlman. She seemed not to mind much though, she was smiling and waving and even did a pass-by for them, waving from the backseat of her car. Seventy-six and still working the photographers, damn, that lady is a pro.

Post-departure, a star-stunned hostess revealed that Liz’s liquid-lunching entourage included her personal assistant, driver, body-gaurd, and veterinarian. Beat that, Sean Combs.

- Sean Leffers



a realistic look at highland life

scottish-highlands-house.jpg

This is the place where I will ride bareback across fields, raise strong, beautiful children, and spend my evenings writing and reading by our blazing hearth.

(with David Beckham, furnished by Ralph Lauren Home, groceries delivered by yummy.com, and weekly visits to London.)

Houses with a View via Stefan Tueshaus



we take our domestic violence overseas
March 13, 2008, 6:40 pm
Filed under: buddhism, culture, drama, fashion, gay, people, relationships, romance, travel

sean-koh-phangan-new-years-08-drunk.jpg 

this is me in the early hours of january 1st 2008 on the main beach in hadd rin on koh pha ngan in the gulf of thailand. i think i’m trying to put a spell on you with my magic pail of vodka.

surprising: i never threw-up.

not surprising: tom and i got in a huge fight and ended up not even speaking to each other. this is a new year’s eve tradition for us. the year before it nearly came to blows as we sat watching the fireworks over puerto vallerta. i guess there’s something about romantic sea-side relaxation and awe-inspiring beauty that fills us with murderous rage. next year we’re planning on giving each other minor disabilities in st. barts.



it isn’t vagina dialogues…
March 12, 2008, 1:28 pm
Filed under: crime, culture, drama, ethical dilemmas, etiquette, food, friends, gifts, people, relationships, romance

hi girls, what’s up?

oh, your vaginas are acting up?

cool… except not.

lately, i’ve noticed alot of girls talking unabashedly about their vaginas. in class, over dinner, in da club: vagina, vagina, vagina.

this is inappropriate. stop it, please.

     But wait, you say, I saw famous, respectable women talking about their vaginas in the vagina monologues and oprah talks about her vajayjay!

true. but there is a difference. for clarity’s sake, i will list people who you may, and may not, talk to about your vagina:

people that you may talk to about your vagina:

your mom

your sisters

your husband or fiancee (and probably only if you have cancer)

dr. ruth

close girlfriends or gay friends who you know won’t be weirded out

oprah: i know she’s probably not your close friend but emotionally she probably might as well be

note: none of these count if you are within earshot of someone enjoying a meal.

people you may never talk to about your vagina:

anyone sitting across a dining table from you

men

television presenters whose program’s audience isn’t at least 80% women

me (half a dozen girls exempted)

i am sorry. i must be so victorian. i just think that it is an odd thing to talk about. i know women should be empowered by their “sex”…

it just seems a little less special when you talk about it to everyone.

 plus it’s gross.

sarah silverman channeling georgia o’keefe

sarah silverman channeling georgia o’keefe via the huffington post