Filed under: crime, culture, drama, ethical dilemmas, etiquette, food, friends, gifts, people, relationships, romance
oh, your vaginas are acting up?
cool… except not.
lately, i’ve noticed alot of girls talking unabashedly about their vaginas. in class, over dinner, in da club: vagina, vagina, vagina.
this is inappropriate. stop it, please.
But wait, you say, I saw famous, respectable women talking about their vaginas in the vagina monologues and oprah talks about her vajayjay!
true. but there is a difference. for clarity’s sake, i will list people who you may, and may not, talk to about your vagina:
people that you may talk to about your vagina:
your mom
your sisters
your husband or fiancee (and probably only if you have cancer)
dr. ruth
close girlfriends or gay friends who you know won’t be weirded out
oprah: i know she’s probably not your close friend but emotionally she probably might as well be
note: none of these count if you are within earshot of someone enjoying a meal.
people you may never talk to about your vagina:
anyone sitting across a dining table from you
men
television presenters whose program’s audience isn’t at least 80% women
me (half a dozen girls exempted)
i am sorry. i must be so victorian. i just think that it is an odd thing to talk about. i know women should be empowered by their “sex”…
it just seems a little less special when you talk about it to everyone.
plus it’s gross.
sarah silverman channeling georgia o’keefe via the huffington post
Filed under: crime, drama, ethical dilemmas, kindness, people, the new york times
i decided to send a letter to randy cohen, who writes the column “the ethicist” for the new york times magazine, in order to solve my ethical dilemma. i hope he replies, i love his column. here is the letter i wrote:
Dear Mr. Cohen,
Recently, my home was robbed. Thousands of dollars worth of things both replaceable and irreplaceable were stolen, as well as my car. A few days later, my car was recovered and the people allegedly responsible were arrested. Upon receiving my car, I discovered that it was filled with the possesions of one of the people in custody. I tried to give the things to the impound lot, but they wouldn’t take them and when I called the detective working on the case, she told me to do whatever I wanted with the things. Would I be acting correctly to give the items ( mostly clothing and other personal things) to a charity shop? Or do I have an ethical obligation to try to return them to their owner, even if they stole from me?
Thanks for your time,
xxxx
Filed under: being poor, crime, drama, ethical dilemmas, kindness, los angeles, people
so, i got a call from the police at 2 in the morning, they had my car, and had arrested the two people who were driving it on crenshaw. the girl in the driver’s seat was 16 and apparently a repeat offender. getting the car back took forever, at first they wouldn’t let me have it because they insisted that it was still stolen, even though you could see it in the impound lot. i know there are some very intelligent police officers out there, but i didn’t meet any yesterday.
the car is ok i think, although they smashed one of the side mirrors, broke one of the tail lights, the check engine light is on, the gps is gone, and someone wrote their initals on the glove compartment-door. unfortunately, everything that i had in the car (cds, chargers, gym clothes, owner’s manual and registration documents) are all gone.
the weirdest thing was that all of this girl’s stuff was in the car and it seemed like she had been living in it, sad. The police told me she was a “problem child” and that they were trying to put her in some kind of prison-school. i took all of her things (clothes, make-up, instant oatmeal, maxi-pads) and put them in a bag. my first thought was to take them to the police station and my second thought was screw that, that little bitch stole all my shit. her clothes are in the dryer now, i’m going to give them to out of the closet, they will probably give her a uniform at her new school. I feel kind of guilty, like i’m enforcing some petty lex talionis, but i do know, from personal experiance, that the worse the consequences, the better you learn your lesson… or would she be better inspired by a wronged stranger’s kindness? idk.
